(when the feeling’s gone and you can’t go on, tragedy)
no, nothing like that – this is about fashion tragedy. Self respect tragedy.
I was taking a couple of DVD’s back to Blockbuster on Sunday afternoon (please note the time of the day, it is central to this story) when I was queuing behind a very large lady – nothing exceptional or particularly noteworthy there you might think, but it’s the details that matter.
Lets look at the main points.
1. She was wearing pyjamas
2. Also a fluffy dressing gown with breakfast (or worse) stains
3. And slippers
4. With her hair like she’d stuck her finger in a power socket (I’m not kidding)
5. She had full on facial hair
6. It was 4pm.
7. In a busy video store.
8. She was carrying milk, so she’d obviously been into the supermarket or garage too
So, being the man about time that I am (and a downright sneaky bastard) – I took a pic.
Ok, not a great pic, but I didn’t want to get busted and you get the idea.
When does self respect fall so low that you roll out of bed and just rock on up to the shops without so much as thinking “humm, maybe I should have a shower and run my fingers through my hair and maybe get fucking dressed into some outside clothes”
Tragic.
Full on facial hair!? OMG!!! I wish there was a good sneaky way to get pictures of peoples’ faces.
I can’t hate too much…I’ve been known to wear fuzzy slippers to the grocery before. Then again it was about 1am though.
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I’m sure the hair is not her fault, but it just added to the rest of the fashion disaster. There’s a world of difference between wearing slippers at 1am and rolling out of bed straight into the shops in the middle of the day! That said, its a slippery slope, one moment slippers, the next – your very own entry on ‘People of Walmart’ :p I’m keeping my eye on you! LOL!
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Sometimes I go out like that too when I’m really lazy LOL. Can’t you get a more decent picture?
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Nooooo, don’t do it! I feel bad about not shaving in the mornings, even if I don’t have to leave the house all day – I’d never contemplate going out in pyjamas!
I would get a better picture, but she didn’t look too happy, so I didn’t want to push it. Maybe next time..
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Hi Rich,
You have me laughing aloud… Nice blog btw!!
It kind of reminds me of an incident, not strikingly dissimilar to this one.
Simone and I were up near Iona and were scouting around for a campsite to stay on. We saw one of those old battered up wooden signs by a lane “Camping >” looks like it was written by a 4 year old with the wrong end of a broken paint brush.
The campsite was a farm, edging onto some sand dunes. We parked up and ventured over to the farmhouse rang the doorbell. Dogs barked, mother shrieked at children. The lady you described from Blockbusters (it must be her) opens the door, behind her were her tribe of children peering out with wide eyed surprise that someone had rang the doorbell. Several seconds of silent observation (them of us) before she spoke and gave us some details of the “facilities” – anyway. Back to the village the next morning – about 8:30 we were choosing what type of processed cheese we wanted with our par-baked rolls. The door opens, the Blockbuster lady rolls in – still in same outfit, stack of “Video Tapes” – not DVD’s under her arm. She stocks up on 6 (no really) 3 litre bottles of Coca Cola, jumbo value crisps and another huge stack of videos. I would have taken a picture but I was truly afraid.
Ah, the good life…
John
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we aim to please 🙂
your story is better than mine for it tells of not washing and changing outfits from one day through night to the next day too. I do that with my hair, but thats about it!
Perhaps life in ‘the village’ (say in deep Cornish accent – why Cornish I don’t know, but it would probably work better for my purposes than a Scottish accent) means that things like getting dressed and personal hygiene are less important.
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